“Somewhere in that fall something was irrevocably changed and when I woke up I couldn’t remember why it was that I’d tried to commit suicide...And I knew it was alright. Even if Dad was a cripple. And I asked Mam what had kept her going. Through everything that had happened. And she said she didn’t know.. But she said there was one time when she first brought him home. There was this one day when she just couldn’t cope any more and she got all these pills and a bottle of whisky and lined them all up in a row. And just before she was going to take them, she heard Dad moan from next door and she went in to see him. And she looked down at his face and on it was a smile. Just a brief smile. For a second. And then it was gone.